January 2010
48 posts
4 tags
Fm SoCS - #0069 - 01/31/2010 - 1:20am-1:25am EST
The harmonica lay there on his dresser, untouched for the last few years. Clint had gotten it from some trinket shop while on vacation with his family. It was just one of those impulse buys where you think, “Hmm… The harmonica seems like an easy enough instrument. I didn’t bring any instruments with me. Five bucks doesn’t seem like a lot for a harmonica. I can learn a song on it in, like,...
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Fm SoCS - #0068 - 01/30/2010 - 2:35am-2:40am EST
Bonnie stammered out her two lines and promptly exited the stage. She’d never been comfortable with the idea of being on stage, let alone being in an actual production that people paid money to see. It was something that she felt was necessary, though. She needed to get more confidence, and this seemed like a good way to do it. Bonnie was the type to just dive right into a problem head first,...
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Fm SoCS - #0067 - 01/29/2010 - 1:55am-2:00am EST
Once I lived near a tree that bore apples, Red and lovely were they. I would sit beneath it and drink my Snapples, When I would pass the time of a lazy day.
I never did like to eat of the fruit of that tree, Though many around me did. The flavor never did seem right to me, Even when I was a kid.
Oh, sure, I’d eat apples from a store, Green ones, big ones, sauced ones, too, Until my stomach was...
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Fm SoCS - #0066 - 01/28/2010 - 3:51am-3:56am EST
Taking control of the ship, Captain Noonanche set a course for the Panto Galaxy. He hadn’t seen Landolynn in near five earth-months, and he was afraid she was beginning to forget his face. He’d been without video communication for nearly the entire trip, and he was itching to get back home to finally see her again, face-to-face.
“I’m coming, Lynny,” he said aloud as he kicked the ship into...
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Fm SoCS - #0065 - 01/27/2010 - 1:35am-1:40am EST
Socks. I gotta find my socks. Why is it that you can never find a clean pair of socks when you need them? Let me rephrase that. Why is it I can never find a clean pair of socks when I need them?
Is my life so disorganized that I can’t find one lousy clean pair of socks? How long has it been since I’ve done laundry? I’ve got enough socks for at least a few weeks, longer if I don’t have to...
WatchThis is hilarious.
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Fm SoCS - #0064 - 01/26/2010 - 2:01am-2:06am EST
Marty Monkey was dancing to his master’s music. He didn’t much care for the colorful box that continually plunked out tunes as his master cranked it, but he was, nonetheless, hypnotized by its melodies. He couldn’t help but dance as soon as his master began to crank.
Marty had seen humans walking around with other types of music boxes, with sounds that had no similarities to his master’s. He...
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Fm SoCS - #0063 - 01/25/2010 – 1:47am-1:52am EST
Belching loudly, Gary slumped back into his chair and unfastened his belt. His wife gave him a slightly disgusted look, rolling her eyes.
“C’mon, honey,” Gary replied. “You know, when the belt comes undone, the meal was exceptional.”
“I know,” she said as she began clearing the dishes, “but it’s my job to be slightly disgusted at all times.”
“You’re putting yourself into a stereotype, you...
rickyv:
I wonder if we call it a BLT because we’d feel bad asking for a “bacon sandwich.”
This is great!
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Fm SoCS - #0062 - 01/24/2010 – 1:51am-1:56am EST
1: Yo! Pinky!
2: What’s up ring?
1: Have you heard what index has been up to?
2: No, not at all.
1: Well, I’ve got a secret source who’s been telling me…
2: Your source is the middle finger right?
1: Dude, don’t say his name! He might hear you. He’s supposed to be my secret source.
2: Who else do you spend most of your time with besides me and middle finger? Honestly?
1: Well…
2: And,...
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Fm SoCS - #0061 - 01/23/2010 - 2:10am-2:15am EST
Barry was telling another lame joke on stage when Candice walked through the door. She always came in late for his shows because she was getting off of work, but her lateness wasn’t the point. The point was that she came, every show. She didn’t care that he wasn’t really the best of comedians. He was her man, and that’s all that mattered to her.
When she came in, he always seemed to get...
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Fm SoCS - #0060 - 01/21/2010 - 11:35pm-11:40pm EST
Dirkwood simply didn’t understand.
“The ball was there in his hand,” he pondered. “Then, he threw it. But, where did it go? He must have thrown in really really fast.”
Dirkwood peered out with more focus than he ever remembered mustering in his entire life. He simply could not see where the ball went. Slowly, as the seconds waned and he began to lose his attention, his tail began to...
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Fm SoCS - #0059 - 01/21/2010 - 1:27am-1:32am EST
The bulb flickered dimly in the dark basement.
“What smells in here?” Danielle asked as she slowly came down the stairs.
“Nobody’s been down here in ages,” replied David, equally repulsed. “Who knows what’s in here?!”
As they reached the bottom of the stairs, they could both perceive the rustling of bugs, rats and all manner of critters.
“No wonder your granddad had this placed locked away,”...
MACGRUBER TRAILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! →
gracenmichelle:
purns:
THIS IS IT. THIS IS IT!
I’ve always like these sketches on the show, and when I heard about there being a movie, I was wondering how they’d stretch out a MacGruber story to feature length. After watching the trailer, I understand.
I’m excited! This may be the best movie based off of an SNL skit in…forever!
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Fm SoCS - #0058 - 01/20/2010 - 1:19am-1:24am EST
Can’t stop now. Gotta keep going. No looking back. No slowing down. I gotta do it. I gotta finish.
What am I doing with my life?! Why the heck am I here doing a marathon?! What good is it going to do me except that I’m going to be immobile for the next couple of days? Why did I agree to do this? Why did I… Uh oh… The guy in the red shirt is passing me up again. I gotta beat that...
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Fm SoCS - #0057 - 01/19/2010 - 12:49am-12:54am EST
Tasting the free samples she was just given, Bernice wandered about the Mega-Mart, not looking for anything in particular. She just loved going there. It was sort of a ritual with her. She woke up Saturday, had a light breakfast (so she’d have room for the free samples), sometimes showered, got dressed in some relaxed walking clothes and headed off to the Mega-Mart.
They always had...
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Fm SoCS - #0056 - 01/17/2010 - 11:29pm-11:34pm EST
In the darkness, he felt around for the flashlight. The power had gone off right in the middle of writing his term paper. Of course, it did. It’s the best time for the power to go off, when you’re under the gun to try and finish something.
It was almost comical how you could hear a unison cry of frustration from the entire dorm the moment the power had been knocked out. Most everyone was...
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Fm SoCS - #0055 - 01/17/2010 - 1:57am-2:02am EST
Thomas had been coding for hours. He was really in the zone today, coding faster and more precisely than he ever remembered coding in his life, but he was starting to slow down now. His hands were getting cramps. He suddenly realized that he was actually sweating a little. It wasn’t too hot in the room or anything like that; he was just working that hard.
“Okay,” he said aloud, “time to take...
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Fm SoCS - #0054 - 01/16/2010 - 1:14am-1:19am EST
Barry was super focused on the task at hand. One wrong move and it was all over. If he breathed, it was all over.
Barry needed to sneeze.
He felt the tickle in his nose, but he couldn’t stop to fully acknowledge it. Then, his eyes started to water. He was neck and neck with his competitor, and he couldn’t stop now.
He placed the final card. The timer sounded. He’d won. Then, he sneezed...
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Fm SoCS - #0053 - 01/15/2010 - 4:32am-4:37am EST
Panic instantly set in as Gerald lay down in the bunker as quickly as he could. Enemies surrounded him. They could be anywhere. Quickly he peeked out to get a view of what was around, but he wasn’t quick enough.
“Dude!” Gerald yelled at the screen. “How did you snipe me so fast?!”
Peter’s voice came over the voice-chat, “I’m unemployed and live with my parents. What do you expect me to do...
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Fm SoCS - #0052 - 01/14/2010 - 3:12am-3:17am EST
On the moon Antwerp, Jabberjib was bobbing along with his pet squampid, playing with his new spurdlewhap that he’d gotten for Smer Smer Day. He whapped and slapped and clapped his spurdlewhap until he could whap, slap and clap no more.
Fortunately, that’s also when Jabberjib’s mom telecommed him to come home for dinner. Always the obedient child, he hopped into the nearest teleporter and was...
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Uncle Pirate Promotional Picture! →
Here are some pictures we took today for promotional purposes! I didn’t know they were going to be up so quickly!
Come see the show to see what the heck is going on in these. We open this weekend!
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Fm SoCS - #0051 - 01/13/2010 - 2:35am-2:40am EST
Ted’s mac and cheese was almost ready. He’d been waiting for this all day. He’d forgotten to eat something that morning, and once his day gets started, it’s pretty hard for him to get to a point where he can really have a meal…not fast food, not some over-priced fancy looking (but not fancy tasting) substance from one of the nearby delis or cafes, but a real meal.
Good ol’ mac and cheese was...
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Fm SoCS - #0050 - 01/12/2010 - 3:30am-3:35am EST
“Ew! That’s gross!”
Bernie was eating his boogers again. At first, he just did it out of curiosity, but when he saw the reaction that he got from Samantha, he had no choice but to continue doing it. Every day, Bernie would “mine for gold” or “dig for buried treasure”, and every day, he would get a huge reaction from Samantha.
Bernie actually had a little bit of a crush on Samantha. She...
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Fm SoCS - #0049 - 01/11/2010 - 12:53am-12:58am EST
Bending over backwards, Reggie was attempting to do a backwards crabwalk (or whatever the heck it’s called). His buddy, Greg, was trying to make a very, very independent horror film and wanted to try to get his friends to do the stuff that the freaky people in horror films do…only without the aid of CG.
“Hmm…” observed Greg. “I don’t think it’s freaky enough. Can you turn your hands backwards...
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Fm SoCS - #0048 - 01/10/2010 - 4:07am-4:12am EST
1: Can’t I just do my jogging in peace?
2: It’s not like I’m stopping you.
1: You insist on coming with me to chat along the way.
2: I don’t like to jog alone.
1: Well, I do. I like to clear my head.
2: Then, why do you listen to music while jogging?
1: It’s my white noise, to drown out all of the surrounding noises.
2: But, isn’t that just more noise to distract you? True white noise is...
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Fm SoCS - #0047 - 01/09/2010 - 4:22am-4:27am EST
Benjamin bowed graciously to the King as he headed back to his throne. It wasn’t everyday that one saw a king, let alone get knighted by one.
Benjamin never considered himself a fierce warrior, or a warrior at all, for that matter. He was but a humble cobbler, like his father before him and his father before him. In fact, Benjamin was seventh in a long line of cobblers. So, when approached...
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Fm SoCS - #0046 - 01/08/2010 - 1:13am-1:18am EST
Wobbles the Clown was working a triple today. He’d already been to two birthday parties and was now on his way to a corporate event. Though they often yielded the most money, they were his least favorite to do.
Wobbles (aka Randy Wilson) had been clowning for nearly 17 years by this point. It seemed as though he rarely ever used his real name anymore, except on tax forms. He didn’t really...
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Fm SoCS - #0045 - 01/07/2010 - 1:35am-1:40am EST
Their boat drifted listlessly along what seemed like a non-existent tide. Jeremy and Ron had been on the water for fifteen days now. They brought enough supplied for an entire month, but they were behind schedule in where they were supposed to be.
Ron started planning this little voyage months ago. He’d always dreamed of living on a boat for a few weeks with nothing but the sky and sea, a...
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Fm SoCS - #0044 - 01/06/2010 - 2:24am-2:29am EST
Building the fence around his mind, Xin Zhang settled in for a long afternoon of meditation. This is something that he’d been doing for the past fifteen years. It was a daily ritual that had never been broken or disrupted. He’d been spoiled by that bit of good luck. Living out in the middle of nowhere, where no human disruption would or could take place, it was an astounding luxury that not...
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Fm SoCS - #0043 - 01/05/2010 - 3:23am-3:28am EST
The spider was lumbering along in his daily wander around the north side of the house. That’s where he was comfortable. That’s the world that he’d known for his entire life. Sure, that life was only about 4 weeks, but this was his own life, his own perception of his own life.
I know what you’re thinking: “Isn’t the north side of the house the one with the water spout?” Yes…yes, it is. ...
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Fm SoCS - #0042 - 01/04/2010 - 2:47am-2:52am EST
Gene was looking for something in his closet. He couldn’t remember what it was that he first started searching for, but he figured that if he kept searching, he’d find it and remember why he was looking for it.
“Get out of there, dummy,” Sarah said as she entered Gene’s room, uninvited. As usual, Gene ignored her the first time. “C’mon,” she said in a slightly sterner tone. “You need to get...
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Fm SoCS - #0041 - 01/02/2010 - 11:30pm-11:35pm EST
Bent completely out of shape over the whole situation, Wimbledon Bendifurth III (known as “The Black Bend” to his biker friends) chucked his wrench at the wall, causing a few sparks to fly upon impact.
“I’ll never get this blasted hog running again,” he howled in frustration. Dog Bite really did a number on it with his spiked wheels. He and Wimbledon were in a bit of a race, and, being the...
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Fm SoCS - #0040 - 01/02/2010 - 12:25am-12:30am EST
He was chewing through a hole in the fence when Roger, the Burtons’ Labrador retriever, heard his masters calling for him. He wasn’t trying to escape or anything like that. He loved his masters. This was just a particularly good part of the fence to chew on. It had just the right age and angles and taste and… His mouth began to water even more when he thought about it, but he was being...
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Fm SoCS - #0039 - 01/01/2010 - 4:09am-4:14am EST
Building a bridge was harder than Landon thought it would be. He just wanted to be able to easily cross the stream from his house to that of his true love. “We could just have a bridge here,” his love said matter-of-factly, “and be able to go to each other whenever we want.”
Landon now truly knew the meaning of the phrase, “Easier said than done.” He’d thought that it would only take some...